Healing the wounds of the child within
I recently became a grandmother. This tiny human who is entirely dependent on the world it has entered fills me with absolute awe.
How will this world receive him?
How will he experience this journey of life here on Earth?
Some children have safety, security, love, bonding, and all that a child needs as a given. Others are less fortunate.
Does a baby know how fortunate it is or not?
All it knows is what it experiences. That is a misperception. In our work within the realm of Family Constellations, we see the emotionally wounded inner child from pre-conception, conception, pre-birth, birth, and early life experiences.
Consciousness exists long before birth and long after we leave this life journey.
Why is it possible that a child experiences inner wounds early in life?
Your “inner child” is a part of your subconscious that has been picking up messages way before it could fully process what was going on (mentally and emotionally). It holds emotions, memories, and beliefs from the past and hopes and dreams for the future.
It was only when I started to recognise that I, as a mother, could only give my children as much as was available to me that I understood my children’s inner wounds and accusations of my failings as their mother.
I recognised my inner child wounds in my children, albeit in another form.
When children are emotionally and mentally injured, neglected, or even abused in childhood, those inner wounds never heal. The child may act out, including having temper tantrums, facing challenges in making friends, and remaining suspicious of the motives of others.
I am this child.
I vowed my children would never experience the traumas of my childhood. I tried to protect them from my experiences, and they met with their own experiences that I could not protect them from experiencing hurt and pain.
The inner child’s wounds create a life path that continues with the learned survival behaviour of the inner child. The resilience I built to survive came at the cost of too much loss and sadness.
The patterns continue in one form or another until they are addressed and healed. Release from past hurts and pain of childhood trauma allows me and my children to thrive in life.
The question always is: “What if it is too late?”
It is never too late to heal the inner child’s wounds – even if your children are grown up and living a life with their own families. When you release past hurts and pains of childhood trauma to fully thrive in life, you begin to remove the bondage of these pains between you and your children. As you safely navigate and heal wounds from your past, your present self begins to thrive in areas of self-love, forgiveness, and compassion. The unburdening allows your children to regain their self-love, forgiveness, and understanding to create a healing pattern. Healing the child’s wounds within the Family Constellation process allows for more significant alignment and healing within a whole family system.