Conscious Flow • Healing through trauma


What does my sense of belonging do for me now?

It provides me with a feeling of completeness.

The search is over.

Due to the circumstances, both parents found themselves in a predicament as they were at my conception.  As my father described it, it was a moment in which emotions took over—neither thought of the consequences.  

What happens to an ‘unwanted’ child? What happens to an ‘unwanted’ conception?  

We are not consciously aware that at the point of conception, a life is created.  The creation of a child drastically changes and impacts the future of both partners. The moment of passion carries a consequence.  Each partner has an equal part.  Each partner has choices to face that impact the child’s future or not.

The easiest way forward is to eliminate the fetus and pretend that nothing has happened.  Abortion as an exclusion to solve a problem is an option that is often used. We are not consciously aware of the impact this has within a family system.  The family system of both partners is impacted. 


Every child, no matter how early in the pregnancy, has a place in the family system.  The exclusion of an unwanted child carries forward a consequence in both family systems.  

Yes, you may argue that the consequences of having the child also has consequences.  Absolutely.  That is why I hold a tremendous sense of compassion for all parties within me. 

In my case, my mother chose to keep me.  She had planned to give me up for adoption, but circumstance intervened again.  I grew up with my mother and was adopted by my heart father.  My life looked complete, yet something was missing.  

I do have a happy end story.  I did find and connect with my birth father.  

The sense of belonging has brought a sense of peace into my life.  

The search is over.

I feel complete within.

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